To Begin is the Hardest Step

Writing about one’s self is probably the most self indulgent thing that anybody can do. First of all, one needs time. Time to think, prepare, reflect on past experiences and then, ultimately time to write. Secondly, one need’s the gut determination to finish the wordy journey and coming out the other end reasonably unscathed. People who write about their lives always have something inspiring to share with the world. It is usually some tragic tale where, in the end, their self determination proves everyone wrong and they triumph. Maybe that is why I am writing this story. I want to feel that I will come out on top. I guess that my story is about overcoming me, Emma. Now I haven’t seen the hardest of times or picked the last proverbial straw or even scrapped the bottom of the barrel with the barrel actually being life. I believe that we are all dealt our own individual problems given to us from the universe. Some have it worse than others. But I also believe that we can only learn by taking the problem and owning it and sharing what we have learnt so that someone else my have a less rocky road to travel. Yes, this is what I shall do here. I will tell you my story so that you will learn and hopefully be inspired to share your tale in your own way.

So I bet by now you are wondering what has been forced upon my life that warrants a blog? Well, I have been living with a condition that has only finally been diagnosed. I have lived with multiple symptoms that have known to confuse both doctors and myself. I do not know if the diagnosis is the definite cause of all my symptoms. What is certain, for sure, is that I have survived through chronic joint and muscle pain spiced with seizure like activity and topped off with obscured eyesight that is apparently due to my sensitive brain and a plethora of other complaints. Oh, and memory loss, always the last thing I remember to tell people!

One thing I have found by being a connoisseur of “Cybercondriac-ism” is that apart from researching different disease/syndromes information, the best nuggets of hope came from stories of patients. It was wonderful being able to relate to stories told online and even help participate in someone else’s struggle through the world of the disruptive anatomical unknown. There are never enough personal stories out there detailing what they really went through. So maybe this is why I am writing late at night, high on coffee and restless legs. I will take you through my life from my very first belly pain to the halo outlining everything I can see even as I type these words.